Worried about my daughter

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    I’ve never joined a site like this, so forgive me if I’m doing any of it wrong! I’m so worried about my daughter. She’s just turned 13 and she’s just so anxious all the time. I’m not sure what to do. It started a few months ago, she was getting worried about things at night. Usually pretty normal stuff, something she was doing the next day or something a friend had said. Now it just seems like it’s all the time, about lots of things; food poisoning, someone breaking in, illness, someone dying. I can’t think of any one thing that triggers it and she seems so unable to talk about it.

    Is this just an age thing? Am I overacting? I just don’t know what to do anymore.


    Welcome 00Debs00 thank you for sharing this with us!

    I can’t imagine how difficult this must be for you, as her mother all you must want to do is protect her and see her happy. I can share my experiences from your daughters perspective, having suffered from anxiety at a young age myself, my mum was the one who got me through it. She never did any thing out of the ordinary, I just always felt her love and understanding. Whether I wanted to talk or not I always knew she was there.

    My advice is to just be present, hold her hand, give her hugs, ask how she is and have girly days out x


    Hello Deb and welcome!

    Don’t worry, you can’t do anything wrong here! ;O)

    It must be really concerning for you…I’ve got a young daughter who worries a lot, so I can only imagine what you must be going through.

    I can’t agree with Andrea more. Be there to listen, I’m sure you’ll get a sense from her what she needs. Go with your gut…if you want to hold her, do it. On the other hand, if you feel you want to seek professional advice, then do that too. Don’t be afraid. Mother’s instincts are generally right…take strength from that.

    And remember we’re all here for you. Pour your heart out here and we’ll be here to pick you up!

    Take care to you and your daughter x


    hi and thank you for your replies. She is definitely going through a tough time at the moment. I am thinking I would be better to take her to see the doctor, but I do not know if he will take us seriously. she is very reluctant to go but i think I need to make her. thank you for your support and I will let you know how we get on.


    Hi Debs!

    I’d say if that is what your gut is telling you, then DO IT!

    She may not want to go, as you say, but you’re the parent and only you know what she needs.

    Don’t be afraid to seek help from professionals…in my experience they are fantastic! THE most understanding and caring people you’ll likely ever meet. And remember, they’re not out to ‘test’ or ‘believe’ you…they will only want to help!

    Keep in touch…we’d love to know how you’re both getting on x

    • This reply was modified 1 year ago by LucyLucy.

    I’ve just read the start of this chat, as my sister has been diagnosed with Anxiety. I don’t know anything about it, but I recognised what 00Debs00 has said above. I can’t believe I missed the signs, I just thought she was worrying! Its so hard when I’m raising kids and trying to be there for her. Perhaps I should have been around more and then I would have noticed and then maybe she wouldn’t be ill.
    I need to understand more about it, in the meantime as suggested above I’ll just be there for her, as much as I can.


    For me there are a few key things, the first is to trust your instincts. You know your daughter better than anyone so you have to do what you think is right.
    The second thing is m, I agree, the most important thing is to be there.

    A friend of mine gave me some really solid advice about how to tackle worrying. It’s not the same thing, clearly, but I wonder if the A’s ice holds true for anxiety.

    Keep a diary. When you are anxious about something or worry about something write it in the diary. This doesn2 things, it gets it out and away from you, the action of putting it on paper means it’s shared and released. Second when the event has taken place and you know the outcome, look back and what you thought would happen and what did. It’s never as bad and over time it might help to see that things are never as bad or difficult as you might think they will be.

    I hope that helps.
    A x


    thank you for your advice I will definitely get her to start doing that i think it will help her feel more in control. In the meantime we have been to see our doctor and she was incredibly understanding and caring. She has referred my daughter to be assessed so at least I feel like we are being taken seriously. It was a big relief to us both!


    That’s great news Debs…well done you! Let us know how you get on!

    PS. I love the diary idea too!


    This is a small world, we have concerns about my Niece, how are you getting on 00Debs00?


    HI 00Debs00
    I’ve just been writing an article on the power of partnerships with schools and sharing with them what is going on at home, particularly around mental health.

    I am just wondering if you have spoken to your daughters school?

    I have found this extremely helpful for us.


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